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I think some people like kicking people when they are down

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MarilynL
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Post by need_a_break Sun Jul 15, 2012 9:13 pm

Whew! I just came back from a tough emotional weekend with my sister. I kept getting grilled about what I doing to find a job. I am so exhausted. How did my life become only about me being unemployed? The pressure is really getting to me. How do they think we are going to get through the tough job search process without encouragement. I read an article where this one woman said that at least with cancer you get support.

You hear some of these people with jobs complaining that they are so tired. I wish I had their tired.

Does anyone know a good support group in the Washington DC area that I can go to in person or a counselor? I really feel I need to talk to some me friendly faces that understand.

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Post by elvis44102 Sun Jul 15, 2012 11:58 pm

This may sound dumb but, i work with a lot of recovering substance abusers and that's one of the things that gets to me. It the center of attention thing.....hows so and so doing is he/she drinking or whatever??

Its not that i don't care its just that there are other things in the world other than so and so, because i have no "control" over them....

1) for kicks ask whoever s bothering you about a job ask them to put out resumes and try and get an interview.....even if they are now working, don't need a job, whatever....

There are a lot of different 12 step groups all branched off from AA's original idea....
12 step people are good listeners if they have a few years of experience
Find a 12 step group and attend a meeting, they have them every night


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Post by need_a_break Mon Jul 16, 2012 9:46 am

Thanks, elvis44102. I will check that out.

I don't think they know or care just how bad it gets.

I had to leave a low-paying job because I couldn't stay at the apartment I was living. The retail store said that I couldn't do merely a transfer because I was flex-time associate. They gave me a what they called a "favorable" termination. But when I interviewed with another branch, I have not received any email response from them. I am now feeling that all the good working relations, I had at the original store is gone because I had to leave or the creditors hounding me had something to do with it.

All the support goes to the creditors that hound you and make you life miserable. They making it nearly impossible to lift myself out of this situation.

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Post by serhardt25 Mon Jul 16, 2012 12:53 pm

Tell me about it. When I lost my job four years ago, my so called friends began staying away from me. To prove that I was not a lazy loser, I went back to college to finish a degree in fisheries biology and fast forward three and a half years later, I only have a low paying internship to show for it. Presently, there are few job opportunities in Washington State and I don't know where to turn to. $29,000 of student loans will become due at the end of the year. I guess I'm screwed because my wife is unable to work because of health issues and will not be getting any disability Ins. payments until late September.
In the meantime, I had no choice but to withdraw my past retirement contributions to supplement the $1632 that I earn monthly so I can pay my $2800 per month in bills. I am still searching for a job at all times, but I have not experienced any luck doing so. I am scared because I am 43 years old and time has a bad habit of flying by. What this simply means is that I am not that young anymore (Not old though) and employers seem to be heavily biased towards workers who are 40+ years of age. Therefore, it is an employers market and the odds are heavily stacked against me and I will be damned lucky to get a job that pays $36,000 per years because of nepotism in the job market.
Sorry, if I seem long winded, but I had to get this off of my chest because it is also creating a severe strain on my relationships with my family and spouse. Got to go and update my resume yet again. My heart goes out to everyone on this board. Thank you for being patient.

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Post by need_a_break Mon Jul 16, 2012 3:19 pm

Yeah, Serhardt25. No problem, you needing to vent. I had my moments, yesterday.

But without a broad-based plan that will lift people like you and me out of this, we are screwed. I feel we are in a rock and a hard place. Recruiters and and companies that are hiring still want to keep the hiring practices that they had prior to this "Depression".

President Obama and the Congress are not doing what needs to be done to protect us from all the people preventing us from recovering. They still think that all we need is a job, any job but what we need is a job with a living wage and they haven't done that. They are not treating this as a state of emergency.

If Romney turns out to be a corporate shark, then he will be no help to us in the White House.

Grabbing our property and possessions are making some people and companies very wealthy.

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Post by Guest Mon Jul 16, 2012 3:21 pm

Sadly, we are a society that loves kicking people when they are down and making sure anyone who isn't gets taken down. We view every program that promotes fighting, dysfunction and just plain bad behavior and they get top ratings week after week. I don't know when we became a society of the "take down".

What is happening to the unemployed in this country is disgusting, it's just not human.

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Post by Guest Mon Jul 16, 2012 6:23 pm

So very, very true. Just like when your discussing something in the economy that has set in motion more foreclosures on families, or whatever it may be. The person your talking with uses the phrase that some of those people are "losers" anyway. I really want to go off on them, another example of let's just kick them some more. No empathy or compassion for anyone anymore. A real sickness it it's self.

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Post by Guest Tue Jul 17, 2012 3:00 pm

People honestly believe their own press sometimes disgusted. If it hasn't happened to them, then it's not a serious issue and they view those it happens to as losers. I have always hated that term, but have grown to be very leary of anyone who takes that attitude. If you haven't walked in those shoes, please don't comment. Granted we all know of someone or know someone who maybe didn't make all the best choices during their life which led to some problems, but no one, absolutely, no one deserves this from our Country, Our Government, Our Families or Our Friends. We all hope and we all pray it will end while others make names and careers for themselves truly on the backs of others suffering and they call it a campaign and they whip people into frenzies over it. What ever happened to knowing someone before judging them. And where is it written that we all get to judge everyone else, their lifestyle, their clothes their homes, the way they raise families, how many kids they should have, what they should drive. It never ends.

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Post by MarilynL Thu Jul 19, 2012 6:48 pm

Well, I believe the loss of compassion and empathy towards those who are hurting emotionally or financially, started way back. Do you remember about 15-20 years ago, when self-help groups and self-help books exploded out? These groups teach people how to take care of themselves first, in order to help others...but first and foremost "you have to do what you need to do first to take care of "you"..to learned how to say "no". While these groups are a super help for those who have spent their lives catering to the whims of others, some forgot to look deeper into the programs to learn how to find a balance. "Do what you have to do, take care of "you", and once you find that you are person of worth, then you can reach beyond yourself to give others a hand, an ear, but not comprising your beliefs and your way to keep healthy. So... most of that generation grew up in this self centered world, focusing on one objective...how to fulfill their pleasures and have a life that lives up to their fantasies. They no longer take the time to really listen...they don't want to be held back by being there for someone emotionally. It's not their problem, so why make it theirs.

There is also another group of people in society that think only in "black and white"...there are no grey areas. If they can do the right thing, if they can succeed, if they are willing to go beyond what is needed to find that job...why can't the rest of us. They don't take the time to understand what we go thru, therefore all they can see is one thing...you don't have a job, so what's the problem. That black and white thinking has no room for compassion or empathy towards those who are hurting today. If someone has a problem, they should know how to fix it.

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Post by Springflowers Mon Jul 23, 2012 2:56 pm

MarilynL wrote:Well, I believe the loss of compassion and empathy towards those who are hurting emotionally or financially, started way back. Do you remember about 15-20 years ago, when self-help groups and self-help books exploded out? These groups teach people how to take care of themselves first, in order to help others...but first and foremost "you have to do what you need to do first to take care of "you"..to learned how to say "no". While these groups are a super help for those who have spent their lives catering to the whims of others, some forgot to look deeper into the programs to learn how to find a balance. "Do what you have to do, take care of "you", and once you find that you are person of worth, then you can reach beyond yourself to give others a hand, an ear, but not comprising your beliefs and your way to keep healthy. So... most of that generation grew up in this self centered world, focusing on one objective...how to fulfill their pleasures and have a life that lives up to their fantasies. They no longer take the time to really listen...they don't want to be held back by being there for someone emotionally. It's not their problem, so why make it theirs.

Yeah its getting bad out there. Now if you "fail" even your own family will kick you when you are down and blame you, and trust me health problems get you no more mercy too, or even if you worked hard, got the college degree, etc. I see it as the ME generation come to fruition. Sorry to any baby boomers here, and I know it does not apply to you all, but this I believe will be the generation that destroyed America out of pure selfishness. Even their love of police state fascism opposed to the free-willing hippie days of their youth is a sight to see. they hve the whole BE POSITIVE brainwashing too so any one with any problems is to be closed OUT OF SIGHT AND OUT OF MIND.

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Post by JadeBlue Fri Aug 24, 2012 2:57 am

Guest wrote:People honestly believe their own press sometimes disgusted. If it hasn't happened to them, then it's not a serious issue and they view those it happens to as losers.

This. I think this describes so many social problems in the Western world. Some people are just not capable of envisioning scenarios. At most, you get "well, that could happen, but it's unlikely." There is a policy among certain industries that states if a problem happens more than once or twice, you should make sure it never happens again. Why do countries not have this kind of efficiency?

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Post by MarilynL Fri Aug 24, 2012 8:37 pm

[/quote]I see it as the ME generation come to fruition. Sorry to any baby boomers here, and I know it does not apply to you all, but this I believe will be the generation that destroyed America out of pure selfishness. Even their love of police state fascism opposed to the free-willing hippie days of their youth is a sight to see. they hve the whole BE POSITIVE brainwashing too so any one with any problems is to be closed OUT OF SIGHT AND OUT OF MIND.
[/quote]

HAHAH! You hit on the nose!...the ME generaton and the up and coming "Be Positive " pretentious gangs, who have just as much frustrations as we do (in other areas), but believe that walking around with that fake smile, and positive slangs, will make their life better. HAHAH!

I don't know about you, but I'm worn out of trying all angles...I have settled for displaying every emotion I feel...if they don't like, try being me.

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Post by MaryKay Sat Aug 25, 2012 8:47 am

I think what gets to most of us is the attitudes of those who have never walked 1 hr in our shoes, much less the last 4 years.

We all know what "they" say about opinions, we all have family and friends who have "advice" and we all know people who don't think anything is really as bad as it is, unless of course, it's happening to them, then it's an outrage.

But to be fair, as those of us here on this forum know, since the inception of this forum and it's predecessor, we have mounted email, fax, letter, twitter campaigns, asked for signatures on a letter for the 99ers, petitioned Ways and Means, asked for signatures on MoveOn's petitions which should have garnered no less than a million signatures from all of us hit so hard by this and it didn't.

The Admins and members here are working so hard on this and have reached out to friends and family for their support in this and have received it from many, are equally frustrated because we couldn't get all the unemployed to join forces and really have what should have been our own "arab spring" and we didn't get it from the people who most need it, the unemployed.

Being positive and staying pro-active is our only option, because it is truly our only option. If we all don't stay together and rally as one body of unemployed citizens, we won't get that attention.

Those that are rude to us, enjoy seeing us suffer and like to "kick us when we are down", well, there isn't anything we can do about them, there is no changing that line of thinking and it's a waste of time, emotion and energy to try. They will figure it out when they can't afford food, clothes for the kids, tuition for their kids or when they too, get downsized because the economy tanked again.

No one seems to get it. If the millions of unemployed are back to work, with decent wages can start paying their bills, buying goods and truly stimulating the economy, paying taxes, contributing to social security once again, many of our deficit issues will take care of itself. They ignore the numbers of us. Millions paying taxes again, imagine that. They just don't get it. I think some people like kicking people when they are down 34243

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Post by MarilynL Sat Aug 25, 2012 11:10 am

Has anyone tried picketing with signs? I love the numerous ways that everyone has tried to communicate to the media, however, letters, faxes, e-mails, etc, can all be ignored easily, because they're not putting a face to all those correspondence. How about standing in a shopping mall, or in the park, with signs..."Age discremenation is alive and well!"...."30 years of experience hasn't got me anywhere"...."There is no welfare in the state of Massachusetts, when you stop receiving unemployment, you are homeless"...."Do you enjoy that summer home you just purchased...wish I had eve one home!", "Hundreds of resumes sent out, and still no response", "You want professionalism? Then start in your own back yard...respond to us" ....etc, etc, etc...I am sure we can come up with many other slogans

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Post by Kitten Keeper Mon Dec 10, 2012 8:07 pm

I'm a Baby Boomer, but I don't see how I'm responsible for destroying America. I don't remember being pro-fascist, either. Nor do I remember voting for a police state.

But for the past five years everyone's been busy telling me what a piece of crap I am. I'll just add all this to the list of what a miserable loser I am.

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