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Mom's funeral was today

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Mom's funeral was today

Post by rhiannonj on Thu Sep 01, 2011 6:39 pm

First topic message reminder :

It went as expected... very emotional. My 3 brothers were there as well as the rest of the family and members from church. Mom looked better than I expected. Couldn't help thinking she was up looking down on all of us and thinking I finally got my hair done!

I haven't seen close members of my family for 5+ years. Sad that we're spread throughout the country and as we get older it's usually a funeral that brings us together.

My oldest brother Ed gave me Mom's wedding band and engagement ring. I'm wearing the wedding band on my left pinkie finger and her engagement ring on my right. They fit perfect! I just couldn't stick them away in my jewelry box.

So here I am alone in this home where I cared for Mom... still an emotional mess but have so much support and prayers from so many people EVERYWHERE... including you all here.

I'm gonna do my best to take it one day at a time and live in the moment. I did get a call from a guy who is interested in my spare room. I will fight to keep this house! Oh, and btw, did you hear BOA is selling the mortgage part of their company! No wonder why they haven't been calling.

Anyways, I love all of you!! Thanks for your ongoing prayers and support.

Hugs,
Rhi

rhiannonj
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Posts : 141
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Age : 63
Location : Southern Maryland

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Re: Mom's funeral was today

Post by TOO OLD TO HIRE IN PA on Sun Sep 11, 2011 2:44 pm

MaryKay wrote:I think we are all the same there TOTHIPA. I think rhi is having those issues as well. I was shopping, to help our granddaughter's mom out last christmas, and I may have shared this with you, but I apologize if I did. I was a Plymouth Meeting Mall, going to Aeropostale, the new favorite of teens, tweens and the almost tweens, on my way in, there was a silver haired woman, gray slacks, flat black shoes, red peacoat and the "required" red plaid scarf (at least it was in my mom's eyes at christmas time), she was shuffling to the door and I swear I almost reached out and grabbed her and said Mom. I knew it wasn't, but I had to run back to the care and sit and have a cry. When I got into the mall, the girl helping me with the sizes for Abbey and her sister touched my arm and said are you okay, I started to babble and tear up and tell her the story, she looked me in the face and said she had the same thing happen just the other day on her way to work, she swore it was her grandmother. So, I think we all have them, like the hair stories, even if the loss makes us sad, we have the memory which is good. Some people don't have that luxury, even if we are temporarily saddened. (I am babbling again).

TOTHIPA and rhi and all who share this, keep those good thoughts close at hand and have a good cry and then a good laugh. We are lucky to have the memories and crying and sadness make us the good people we are. The sadness is the loss of people we love, that makes us good human beings and good daughters. I will always miss that. What keeps me going, is knowing her suffering has ended, as I am sure you feel that way too. Much love to you both. mk

What a great story and I agree with you. I was just remembering something strange that happened a week after my Dad passed. I heard an alarm in his bedroom which was coming from the clock radio on his nightstand. He NEVER EVER used this feature on the clock. I was totally stunned. I don't usually believe in this sort of thing, but it felt like my Dad was sending me a sign.

TOO OLD TO HIRE IN PA
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Re: Mom's funeral was today

Post by Sad American on Sun Sep 11, 2011 4:44 pm

I just talked to Rhiannon. She justs wants to be alone today with her thoughts and grief.
Thanks everyone for showing your concern and care...

Sad American
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Re: Mom's funeral was today

Post by TOO OLD TO HIRE IN PA on Sun Sep 11, 2011 6:14 pm

Sad American wrote:I just talked to Rhiannon. She justs wants to be alone today with her thoughts and grief.
Thanks everyone for showing your concern and care...

Thank you for keeping us up to date with Rhi. I totally understand what she is going through. I still have those days and it's been awhile since my parents died. Prayers on-going for her.

TOO OLD TO HIRE IN PA
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Re: Mom's funeral was today

Post by rhiannonj on Mon Sep 12, 2011 1:01 am

Hi all, just thought I'd check in. I'm somehow hanging in there. It's just that have so many emotions going on right now... stress, depression, anxiety and it's literally making me sick at times. My caseworker and Pastor Lori are meeting with me tomorrow at 3:30 pm and I'm more than a little apprehensive. Just have to remind myself that they'll be here to help me. Just don't need my caseworker telling me I've gotta start packing up and moving because I have nowhere to go and that would just add more stress. Mom's funeral was only 10 days ago... don't need that.

I really appreciate all your thoughts and prayers. It means a lot to me.

Hugs and blessings,
Rhi

rhiannonj
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Posts : 141
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Age : 63
Location : Southern Maryland

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Re: Mom's funeral was today

Post by Guest on Mon Sep 12, 2011 11:06 am

rhiannonj,

Thanks for checking in! Please keep in touch with us as best you can. We want to know how your doing.

I'm terribly sorry for your loss. We are here for you any time you need to talk. I hope things start to get better for you soon. Crying or Very sad I'm praying for you and also hoping you get some good out of your meeting with pastor and caseworker today.

Please don't lose hope. You are so important and you MUST believe that. Unemployment has a way of making us forget our worth in the world. You are worth so much more than you know. Feel free to pm me anytime if you want to talk.

Take care of yourself and hang in there, ok?

sending cyber hugs, prayers, and positive thoughts your way!

Guest
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Re: Mom's funeral was today

Post by Sad American on Mon Sep 12, 2011 8:20 pm

Things didn't go well for Rhiannon with the social worker and pastor.
If you have any suggestions about options for survival on the East Coast it would be appreciated. We couldn't even get foodstamps because we are poor without children!

Sad American
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Re: Mom's funeral was today

Post by ricky on Mon Sep 12, 2011 10:44 pm

Hi:

I have been folowing this saga and offer my condolences. And afraid something like this would happen.

Sad & Rhi......i will try an expain how the system works. Government workers are not really interested in your problems all they want is numbers to put in thir boxes....and when those numbers are correct you get Approved!

So you have to use this computer to find out what numbers they want. Food stamps max income is $1174 a month for a single person...some states its higher

----------------Are you in PA or MD?

So everything from here on out is a MATH problem.

You need to see why you cant get food stamps without kids..Its a federal program. And they have to give you reason in writing and you can appeal that within 10 days.....

Now down to some serious business...who owns the house? Is anything in your name with your mom? deed credit cards loans?

You can get welfare if you own a house.....of course its back to math.....is there any serious equity in the house if so then chances are it would have to be sold.

If you are underwater chances are the bank doesn't want your home so you could wind up like people in Fla not paying their mortage for 3 years and the bank hasnt even started forclosure...So you may not have to pack for a long time.

I hope this helps and is a good start....MATH their figures vs yours...

----------
Just don't need my caseworker telling me I've gotta start packing up and moving because I have nowhere to go and that would just add more stress.


Last edited by ricky on Mon Sep 12, 2011 11:18 pm; edited 1 time in total

ricky
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Re: Mom's funeral was today

Post by Guest on Mon Sep 12, 2011 10:57 pm

Download and complete this application for food stamps from the Maryland Department of Human Services:

http://dhr.maryland.gov/fiaprograms/fstamp/apply.php

Maryland Community Service Locator:

http://www.mdcsl.org/advantagecallback.asp?template=map_search

Maryland Pro Bono Foreclosure Assistance:
http://www.probonomd.org/foreclosure-homeowner-resources.html

Guest
Guest


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Re: Mom's funeral was today

Post by rhiannonj on Mon Sep 12, 2011 11:17 pm

Didn't go well. Social worker drilled me up one side and down the other. Even as to go as far as my religion affiliations. She told me she was originally here to "assess" me as an individual. She asked me very personal question. She also said someone else referred to her that I was emotionally unstable. After they left I went online and found out that the social worker can "make a pledge" to keep my electricity. But she didn't have a clue about this. She also didn't know about Catholic Charities.

Don't know what to think at this point.

rhiannonj
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Posts : 141
Join date : 2011-02-20
Age : 63
Location : Southern Maryland

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Re: Mom's funeral was today

Post by rhiannonj on Mon Sep 12, 2011 11:24 pm

ricky wrote:Hi:

I have been folowing this saga and offer my condolences. And afraid something like this would happen.

Sad & Rhi......i will try an expain how the system works. Government workers are not really interested in your problems all they want is numbers to put in thir boxes....and when those numbers are correct you get Approved!

So you have to use this computer to find out what numbers they want. Food stamps max income is $1174 a month for a single person...some states its higher

----------------Are you in PA or MD?

So everything from here on out is a MATH problem.

You need to see why you cant get food stamps without kids..Its a federal program. And they have to give you reason in writing and you can appeal that within 10 days.....

Now down to some serious business...who owns the house? Is anything in your name with your mom? deed credit cards loans?

You can get welfare if you own a house.....of course its back to math.....is there any serious equity in the house if so then chances are it would have to be sold.

If you are underwater chances are the bank doesn't want your home so you could wind up like people in Fla not paying their mortage for 3 years and the bank hasnt even started forclosure...So you may not have to pack for a long time.

I hope this helps and is a good start....MATH their figures vs yours...

----------
Just don't need my caseworker telling me I've gotta start packing up and moving because I have nowhere to go and that would just add more stress.

Rick, this house is BIG time underwater. Still waiting to here from BOA about insurance. I will NOT just give up and leave. Let them prove the note. Strange after Mom's death I haven't heard a word from BOA. Still waiting to hear if she had insurance. Would be strange at the age of 85 she didn't. I will fight this.

rhiannonj
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Location : Southern Maryland

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Re: Mom's funeral was today

Post by ricky on Mon Sep 12, 2011 11:29 pm

so what are you worried about? you have a right as an AMERICAN to your day in court.

So dont call BOA just make sure you read all the documents...and if you reply by mail....ALWAYS send it registered return reciept....Judges love to nail people who say they never got it and you have a signiture!

ricky
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Re: Mom's funeral was today

Post by Guest on Tue Sep 13, 2011 12:22 am

rhiannonj wrote:Can't afford to get the AC fixed. Thank god the temps are cooler. Mom's social security and navy annuity that was paid Sept. 1 has been debited from our checking account... $2200. I've got about $300 left in the account and if I can't pay my electric bill by next Friday they will shut it off. Have my social services case worker coming over Monday. Hope she can work some miracles.

Was your Mom in the Navy? If so, you should call the nearest Veteran Affairs office. They may help you with some of this. Also see if there is a St.Vincent De Paul or Salvation Army in your area. They may help with utilities also.

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Re: Mom's funeral was today

Post by ricky on Tue Sep 13, 2011 12:27 am

Rhi:

Is your electric meter INSIDE your house? Then you dont have to let them in,its the law. Let them take you to court and get a judge to sign the order...and you ask the judge if could allow payments. If the meters are outside no such luck....

You could try at the court house to get a OSC Order to show cause to see a judge and then they cant take the meter without a hearing in court usually 3-5 days.

The courthouse can be a good friend.

---I've got about $300 left in the account and if I can't pay my electric bill by next Friday they will shut it off.

ricky
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Re: Mom's funeral was today

Post by rhiannonj on Tue Sep 13, 2011 12:49 am

Sick & Tired wrote:
rhiannonj wrote:Can't afford to get the AC fixed. Thank god the temps are cooler. Mom's social security and navy annuity that was paid Sept. 1 has been debited from our checking account... $2200. I've got about $300 left in the account and if I can't pay my electric bill by next Friday they will shut it off. Have my social services case worker coming over Monday. Hope she can work some miracles.

Was your Mom in the Navy? If so, you should call the nearest Veteran Affairs office. They may help you with some of this. Also see if there is a St.Vincent De Paul or Salvation Army in your area. They may help with utilities also.

Mom wasn't in the Navy but Dad was. After Mom passed they deducted the payment from Sept. 1.

rhiannonj
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Re: Mom's funeral was today

Post by rhiannonj on Tue Sep 13, 2011 12:50 am

So tired.

rhiannonj
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Re: Mom's funeral was today

Post by rhiannonj on Tue Sep 13, 2011 12:52 am

ricky, meter is outside the house. grrr

rhiannonj
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Re: Mom's funeral was today

Post by rhiannonj on Wed Sep 14, 2011 6:29 pm

Good news. I called SMECO (electric company) and they were willing to extend the date for me to pay my overdue balance, because of my good standing, to Oct. 3. They would've cut off my power on Friday. I'm applying for the Maryland Energy Assistance Program but the office isn't answering their phones and I don't want to drive 40 miles one way and find the office closed. I've got all the paperwork and docs ready.. just need to keep calling. Sad American mentioned that they might be overloaded due to Hurricane Irene. Needless to say the last month has been overwhelming. Please keep me in your prayers.

Rhi

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Re: Mom's funeral was today

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